The Teacher plays a game. "Heel or Not Heel?"

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Gather ‘round, children.  I want to tell you a story.

You see, back in my day, which was called “the early 90’s” by us crazy chilluns, things were different.  I’m not saying they were better. . . I’m just saying they were different.  It was a time before you had all these new-fangled “smart phones”, back when a “tweet” was only a sound that a bird made, you see?   

This was a time where you could buy a gallon of gas for less than two dollars and could go to the movies for $4 or $5, and I’m talking about an evening show!  These were the days when Family Matters, you walked Step by Step to a Full House, and other random 90’s television show references as well!

This was a time when you knew the difference between a face and a heel.

And here you thought we weren’t going to be talking about wrestling.

When I began watching the then-WWF in 1993, you could draw a definite line between the good guys and the bad guys.  It was plain as day.  Bret Hart? The ultimate good guy, always battling the odds and fighting for what was right.  Jerry Lawler?  Totally a villain, what with his insults to the crowd and his demeaning looks.   Now, maybe it was because I was a kid and believe what my elders told me (even if my elders were Bobby Heenan and Randy Savage), but I never had a question in my mind as to who the faces and the heels were.

Flash forward to today.  Look around the WWE - can you really tell the difference anymore?

UnInformed Predictions: Looking Ahead at Possible Royal Rumble Participants

For my money, there is no better single PPV concept than the Royal Rumble.  It’s the perfect event for a culture with short attention spans.  Every 60-120 seconds (depending on the year) another superstar enters the mix, leaving a seemingly endless number of possibilities.  There’s always some surprise returns (at least there have been these last few years), some feuds continue while others begin and inevitably Kofi Kingston does something ridiculous, thereby leaving him free to languish in glorified jobber squalor for the next 364 days. . .

Sorry, was I really bitter just then?

Recently it was “officially” announced that this year’s Rumble would feature 40 participants, which I believe is only the second time in history that has happened.  This has only added to the Twit-splosion of predictions, conjectures and fantasy booking as to what’s going to happen, even though we have 3 more PPV’s to go before we get to the ‘start of Wrestlemania season’.

This decision, along with some other nuggets of info I’ve gleaned in the past 24 hours or so, has set my own creative juices flowing.  Therefore, let’s take a look into our collective Crystal Ballz Mahoney and see what the future may hold for our Rumble experience.

By my calculations and creations, there are about 75 possible wrestlers who could be a part of the Royal Rumble.  Let’s break them into groups for easier viewing.

Current WWE Superstars

Musing on the Guy we all Love to Hate. . .

I’m about to type the most polarizing sentence ever. . .

This sentence is going to cause a primal response in a lot of people, and that response is more than likely going to be a negative one.  Now, if you’ve been a follower of my work in the past, this is not necessarily a new thing.  I’ve defended The Miz and Bo Dallas before, and I might just be the biggest Bull Dempsey fan who isn’t a blood relative, so I’m used to people disagreeing with me.  Violently.

However, this sentence is about to take the proverbial cake.

I respect John Cena, and you should, too.

Substitute Contender: Try Some Positivity for a Change!

From time to time, The Teacher is absent, Doc Manson's lab is empty, and a substitute takes center stage.  Today, Shannon Scott (@Love2HulkSmash) discusses the Twitter-verse reaction to the Roman Reigns injury.

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I have been a wrestling fan as long as I can remember. Literally at least two-thirds of my life. It's the only thing I'm truly passionate about. Some of my earliest memories of life involve wrestling, watching it on Saturday nights on TBS with my mom. Yep, I started off as a WCW fan sometime in 1990. It took a few years before I finally found World Wrestling Entertainment, but I knew from the moment I saw Undertaker in 1994 where my heart was destined to stay. Now, 20-plus years later, I am a firm and unashamed WWE loyalist and WWE apologist. At the end of the day, I stand by this company, come what may happen. They have given me memories to last literally a lifetime. I’ve been to lots of house shows, Wrestlemania X-8 in Toronto, a couple Smackdown shows, and just this past summer, I went to my very first RAW broadcast. I’m kind of addicted to them.

Number Two Contenders Summer Slam Preview!

Summer Slam is less than 24 hours away, and the Number Two Contenders have you covered.  Doc Manson and The Teacher are here to discuss matches, angles, predictions and more!

The Teacher:  Doc, does it feel to you like this PPV has taken forever to get here?  It seems like these feuds have been building (or in some cases, not building) for months!

Doc Manson: Yeah, the build has been pretty slow for almost the entire card. I’m starting to feel like a broken record, always talking about the same stories and wrestlers. Although, a few of those wrestlers I talk about aren’t even on the SummerSlam card.

T:  I assume you are referring to one of our favorites, Mr. Cesaro, who will be kicking off the card by not wrestling on it.  He and RVD are scheduled to face off in the Pre-Show.  I’d like to say that having two of the better wrestlers in the company going at it before the PPV means that Summer Slam will be stacked with epic encounters top to bottom, but I just think this is more indicative of some of the lack of quality booking for certain talents.

Cesaro has to win, right?  Even if he’s going nowhere.

DM: They can pull the trigger on Cesaro at any time and he will deliver. I don’t think a win or a loss against RVD on the SummerSlam pre-show is going to make much difference in Cesaro’s career.

Guesses on the first match of the night?

The Teacher's Lounge: If all Summer Slams had Twitter

As almost every single pair of eyes who reads this knows, I, The Teacher, have been pretty addicted to Twitter since the birth of #2Contenders.  One thing I’ve been fascinated with is how the social media age allows everyone to share their feeling right as things happen.  This gives us a primal sense of how people are feeling, since from the looks of it, most people don’t spend a whole lot of time thinking about their tweets before sending them into the Inter-ether.

Which got me thinking. . . With Summer Slam around the corner, what would the history of this huge WWE event look like if Twitter had existed since its inception. . . Quite the thought experiment. . . I humbly submit some of what I believe we’d have seen in the last 20 years.

8/29/88

MegaPowersRule:  Can’t believe we’re getting a 4th #WWF PPV!  Can’t wait to see MegaPowers SLAM MegaBucks!  #Hulkamania  #OhYeah

MillionDollarBaby:  @MegaPowersRule - No way! Everybody has a price, and Dibiase and Andre can’t be stopped!  #MoneyMoneyMoney

State of the WWE: A very early Summer Slam preview

The Teacher:  Doc Manson and I are back once again, friends, only this time, we’re actually going to discuss the art of wrestling, and not just the business of it.

Summer Slam is just a few weeks away, Doc.  Are you excited yet?

Doc Manson: Yes. Absolutely, sort of. What’s on the card again? Aside from Cena v. Lesnar?

T:  Frankly, I don’t think there’s all that much else that’s been decided, besides our main event.

In fact, WWE.com is only reporting 3 matches as of yet.  Cena and Lesnar, Jericho and Bray 2.0, and Stephanie McMahon vs. Brie Bella.

So, I ask you again, Doc.  Are you excited yet?

DM: I had a sudden vision of Bray Wyatt as a cyborg, and I was entertained.

The Teacher's Lounge: Fantasy Booking Plan C-Na

In yesterday’s Teacher’s Lounge, I tried to answer the question “Why do we hate John Cena?”  Today, I have a little fun playing booker and come up with a way that instantly makes John Cena more popular with the older WWE crowd, or at the very least, more interesting.

Summer Slam

John Cena and Brock Lesnar are in the middle of an epic battle for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship.  Triple H is, as usual, seated at ringside.  Paul Heyman stalks around outside, making faces that rival only William Regal and Vince McMahon for their storytelling ability.

As the match reaches its climax, we see Lesnar kick out of the Attitude Adjustment, while Cena barely manages to escape the F-5.  Michael Cole has let us know we have seen “the turning point” in the match 319 times, JBL continues to laud the skills of these athletes, while Lawler says this is the best match he’s ever seen over and over again.

The Teacher's Lounge: Why do we hate John Cena?

Why do we hate John Cena?

Why is it that the majority of adults who watch
professional wrestling groan every time they hear his music?  Why do we despise the jean shorts (Austin wore them), the multi-colored t-shirts with bumper sticker phrasing (The Rock was a slogan machine) and his incessant way of reminding us all exactly where he is?  (In case you had forgotten, the champ is here.)

Do we detest the man himself?  Hardly.  We admire his tenacity to accomplish what he has done in the world of wrestling and we applaud his dedication to charitable work.  Yet why are the WWE fans that frequent social media so rabidly against him?

There is another wrestler who shared a similar fate as John Cena; idol of children, irritant to everyone else.  Like it or not, John Cena is this century’s Hulk Hogan, and by identifying the two biggest similarities between the two, we can discover why Cena finds himself in his current predicament.

1.  John Cena and Hulk Hogan have / had stale characters.